And Then There Were 5...

You guessed it... we are pregnant!  And excited as ever for baby #3.  Even as I sit here and type that, it's weird, awkward, scary and somewhat amazing at the same time.  I don't feel like this is baby #3 since Em and Bennett seem like a package deal.  Wrapping my head around this pregnancy was very different than with the twins.

We didn't plan for the twins, as they were expected to arrive 9 months after our wedding.  Everything about that pregnancy was just "different".  Since we planned this pregnancy and it's definitely only one baby, it all seems very new and somehow foreign.  I started showing around 7 weeks (to myself) and now at 17 weeks, it's no longer, "did Lauren put on some winter weight?"  I have started to feel a little movement and in the ultrasound at 12 weeks, that kid was jumping all over the place.  Must be like moving into a huge new apartment made for two, by yourself.  That or the little babe just knows it needs to practice up for getting away from E&B so it's working on it's moves.

We waited to share this news and chose this as the main outlet because we feel like pregnancy announcements on social media can be so joyous for most people but can also touch the most vulnerable parts of others.  That's a direct quote from my husband Alex.  Please don't mistake our secrecy for un-excitement (if that's even a word).  We are thrilled and so ecstatic for this little one to join our clan.  We just want to remember there are people out there that are struggling to get pregnant, or have had traumatic experiences regarding child bearing and we just are especially sensitive to that.

This pregnancy has had it's many ups and downs so far.  Alex and I had a miscarriage this summer, very early on, within a few weeks of finding out we were pregnant actually.  I won't say I didn't feel inadequate or that I didn't question every thing I ate or did during those two weeks, because I did.  Of course those ugly feelings of guilt come around but thanks to Alex, family and my close friends, we were able to move on, gather ourselves and be able to start trying again.

The first trimester was difficult.  I found out I was pregnant right away (at 4 weeks) and we were so excited.  Nervous, but excited.  The early symptoms started around 5-6 weeks.  Fatigue, round the clock nausea, upset stomach, dizziness, zero appetite, etc.  These guys were the starting line up.  The most frustrating symptom, however, was the dysgeusia, or a the metallic taste in my mouth.  All food sounded bad and tasted horrible.  Nothing sounded good, even water.  I lost like 10 pounds just from not eating and feeling nauseous all day.  I just tried to find things that sounded good and go with them.

When I hit weeks 10-11, I was feeling better.  Now, as I sit at 17 weeks, my biggest pregnancy symptom is being tired.  But I have a feeling it's because of the 2 gremlins I chase around on a daily basis.  We hit another road bump the weekend before Thanksgiving when I woke up with sharp chest pain.  The day before I had some shortness of breath and some pain that I attributed to heartburn, which I had with the twins.  But Saturday night, the pain became paralyzing when I laid down and I knew something was up.  Sunday morning Alex and I went into the Emergency Department to be met with a diagnosis of Pericarditis.  HELLO MEDICAL TERMS, what does that mean?  The Mayo Clinic's definition is the swelling and irritation of the pericardium, the thin, sac-like membrane surrounding your heart.  See their picture below.

Sometimes, fluid can fill up in the space and causes compression on the heart and can create a pericardial effusion.  I had a little bit of that.  My biggest symptoms were sharp pain on inhalation and when laying flat, shortness of breath, and weakness and numbness to my left arm and shoulder.  I was told the cause of this most of the time is viral, but it can also just happen, which is terrifying.  The treatment for me so far has just been ibuprofen around the clock for 3 weeks and next week I will have a repeat ultrasound of my heart.  My cardiologist didn't seem too worried about me and thinks this could just be a one time thing.  But, I'll be seen for checkups for the time being to ensure it's getting better and not worse.

The whole fam came and kept me company in the hospital.. We even took a family nap which was actually glorious.

We ended up having a fantastic Thanksgiving despite our issues.  We traveled to see my family in Indiana.  My cousins all have kiddos around the twins ages making this year the best Thanksgiving yet.  It's so great to see my babies playing with their babies just like we did growing up.  I know that's sappy but it was so special for me and I loved every minute of it.

Cousins: Emmy and Lilly 

Kids table!  

We recreated this cousin photo from back in the day- 

We grew up... and added lots of kids!

Cheesin'

Movie time-- aka parent hang time.

We will see how the rest of this pregnancy goes, I am hoping and praying pretty uneventful.  Our technical due date is May 10th.  However, I decided to have a scheduled c-section because of the last delivery.  And I am measuring about a week ahead of where I'm supposed to be.  That being said, I'm going to be ready to see this baby by the end of April!  And we will be finding out the gender and we already have names... so stay tuned y'all.

Since I haven't had a blog in awhile, here's some recent pics from this fall-

Twins first zoo experience (out of the womb)

Buddy.  Loved.  These.  Guys.

We hope everyone is having a great week!  I'm trying to finish my Christmas shopping by this weekend, but one can wish.  I can't believe it's December 1st already.  I'll soon be turning my attention to a 2 year old party for my sweet loves.  Ah what is life.

See you soon!

Lauren, E&B